Wednesday, May 13, 2015

"Lord, Help Me to Be Content"

Gosh, what a dangerous prayer to pray.

And it seems like if you don't renew your mind in this area of being content with your season then it creeps back up around and you will look up and not even realize that.. you're discontent.

You may cry out to God and say.. "LORD! But... I thought I passed this test of contentment" and in all honesty, you did pass it at one point. But now you're experiencing tests, trials & different situations and you may find yourself simply complaining. Guess what, you passing those previous tests was wonderful, but now you're maturing and growing in Christ. There's a new level of contentment that you have to pass!

This blog was birthed from my OWN recent struggle. I'm 31 weeks pregnant (about 8 months) and I'm in the middle of finishing off the final edit of my new book coming out in less than a month, I'm planning our 2015 Pinky Promise Conference is next month & negotiating a contract for 2016, then, our statewide baby shower in September, marriage & single retreats, still running our Pinky Promise non-profit, I'm still trying to be a great wife, mother, friend, prepare for a new child and then the list goes on and on! On top of all of that, I started to get a few third trimester pains that really started to slow me down. I started to complain, I thought, "Gosh, Lord- must you pile all of this on me during the busiest time of my life?"

So, as I sat before the Lord in my quiet time yesterday, I started to complain and fuss as I prayed. Sounds crazy, right? Then, the Holy Spirit took me to Philippians 4:4 and I saw Paul write.. "always be full of the joy of the Lord." Of course, Lord-- you would take me to that scripture. But I couldn't stop reading that same line over and over again. It struck me like a ton of bricks.

First, let's break down the word always:
1. at all times; on all occasions.

Wait, so at all times, on all occasions, be full of the joy of the Lord?

Does that also include being 8 months pregnant and trying to do a bunch of things? Does that also include when tests and trials hit your life? Does that also include when you feel rejected, hurt, mad, frustrated, lonely, lost? Does that include when you lose your job? Does that include when your boyfriend leaves you and you had plans for marriage? Does that include when a loved one passes away? Does that include when you hate your job? Does that include when you feel ugly? Does that include when you get hurt by a friend or a family member?

Yes. At all times, on all occasions, be full of the joy of the Lord.

Talk about CONVICTION!

And to add to that fun conviction, Paul is in PRISON telling the church to be CONTENT and to find JOY in the midst of their situation. He's in prison. In a tiny little cell that I'm sure is dirty, with tons of insects, it smells, other prisoners are yelling, screaming and let's not even talk about the food. He may or may not have had a small window to look outside. He sat in the prison cell, day in and day out. Not even know when he was leaving. And, he's telling your comfortable self to be content. I cannot imagine what prison is like back in those times. Paul, like the other Apostles, were hated by most of the Jews because they openly and publicly taught that Jesus was the Son of God. The Jews thought this was blasphemy against God and were more than willing to throw someone in jail over the issue. Paul was in jail for about 5 1/2-6 years in total during the time he was on this earth-- all over sharing Christ! Paul was shipwrecked, snakebitten, stoned and eventually beheaded all for the gospel of Jesus! And THIS man is telling US to be content and AT all times, on ALL occasions, be FULL of the joy of the Lord!

This slapped me in the face and seriously challenged my heart. Paul detached from earthly things because the only thing that mattered what "CHRIST BEING WITH HIM." His mindset wasn't on getting a job promotion, on that next TV show that is debuting, or that concert. It wasn't on "when he was gonna find a wife (even though he had the gift of singleness, his focus was what mattered), it wasn't on some fleshly desire. It was on Christ. He knew that he could REALLY do "All things who Christ who strengthens Him" in Philippians 4:13 because Paul was focused not on what he "thought" he should have but on the task that Jesus gave him. Most people totally use that scripture out of context! They scream verse 13 while totally ignoring the scriptures before hand while they operate in their own strength, hoping God will fund their (not His) ideas.

Are you focused on the task that Jesus gave you or are you distracted by what you think you should have?

  • Lord, when is it my time for a husband? I'm tired of being single.
  • Lord, when is it my time for a job promotion? I hate this stupid job that I prayed for and I want more money for doing what I do. They don't appreciate my hard word and I have EARNED it Lord!
  • Lord, when is it my time to be debt free? I've been claiming debt freedom for 15 years and I'm still in debt and broke! (Honey, the same way you get outta debt is the way you got in it. Stop spending)
  • Lord, when is it my time to shine?! I want a stage! I want to see my purpose come to pass! My question to you is for what? For you or for Him?

I'm sure there was a lot of things that Paul "thought" he should have but He made a decision to shut up and encourage others in the Lord. And it wasn't positive thinking. His foundation was actually really trusting in the Lord and allowing for the Holy Spirit to fill His voids. 

What do you do when you are having a rough day? Do you run to an ex, food, porn, a friend or do you run to Christ? I get it, I get it, we all need outlets and times where we pull away but you better make sure that the Holy Spirit is giving you the ok to do what you're doing. Emotional eating, shopping, rushing back to your past or watching pornography will never satisfy you. It will only produce a greater lust in your heart to continue to use those things to temporarily put a bandaid on the issue. 

Isaiah 58:11 "..And the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail."  

Ok, so if this scripture says that the Lord will guide and continually satisfy you, it tells me that most of are aren't giving Him a chance to satisfy our desires. We are too busy using our discontentment as an excuse to continue in our sin. And lets be honest and call it like it is, you just don't trust God to satisfy you. Trusting Him takes way too long  and if Jesus ain't moving fast enough, then you need to help Him out. I have learned that as the Lord guides us continually and leads us that our desires truly become HIS desires. I always say this and I will say it again, it's not that there's a shortage of good men, jobs, whatever else, there's just a storage of patient women that are willing to be developed by the Lord to actually go through the process of trusting Him.

This also goes for your marriage. Some of you are in your marriage and you are not content. You're sitting there dumbfounded because you thought that marriage would cure those feelings that you have but nothing your spouse does is good enough for you. You're just not content with him. Honestly, if you aren't content with him, you're not content with you. You are one flesh and you have brought the spirit of discontentment into your marriage. Instead of bashing him for what he's not doing, why don't you start appreciating him and thanking him for what he IS doing. Maybe he doesn't always take out the trash or clean up after himself. But, he goes to work, loves you, is faithful and he at least tries. Maybe, if he sees you taking out the trash, he will feel convicted and help you. For some reason, we have a hard time with 1 Peter 3:4 and that says that "we should win our husbands over with our quiet and gentle spirits." Let me translate in Heather terms: Shut up and stop nagging him for 10 minutes so the Holy Spirit can speak to him. Your husbands job is not to make you happy. Marriage is ministry and marriage is about serving one another and it's his job to love you like Christ loved the church. Jesus could care less about your happiness because your happiness is relative. It could make you happy to cheat on your spouse. It could make you happy to overeat. Jesus is much more concerned about your eternal salvation than you being led by your happy flesh feelings on this earth. So, it was on my heart in the midst of this blog to just say, "give your husband a break from all of that complaining." Build him up and pray for him like crazy. Speak up as the Holy Spirit leads you and be gracious in your tone.

So, how can one be content?

1. It's time to refocus, spend time with the Lord and really renew our minds concerning the things that are important to us. Search the scriptures on contentment and see what the bible says about it and ask yourself questions like, "have I ever been content? What does contentment mean to me?"

2. Identify open doors. If your void filler is shopping, maybe you need to delete the app that pops up every time there's a sale.  If your void filler is that ex, you need to erase and block his number so you aren't tempted to reach out. If it's overworking, you need to set boundaries and go home at a certain time to make sure that Christ is truly in the center of your life.

3. Admit it. It's time to be totally honest with ourselves and say, "I'm not content with my life and I compare myself to others, Lord help me." Don't push it under the rug & say, "no, that's not me, I'm good. I'm content." But deep down, you desire this things in the pit of your stomach and you constantly question God about those things. Contentment says, in all season, at all time, on all occasions, I will trust in you Lord. 

4. Recognize your problem areas. This goes back to #2. If you know that after a huge test, you want to "go to a bar, drink and get drunk", then you have to avoid those tempting situations. Don't just go and tell yourself that you're getting a "Cranberry drink." If your issue is sex, it's not the best idea to go up to his house or apartment if you know what happens when you do so.

5. Communicate daily to the Holy Spirit. Talk to Him throughout the day. Tell Him that you're not happy, vent, take moments where you just ask Him how He's doing. He's real! He's active and He's more real than the person sitting next to you.

Bonus: PRACTICE this contentment and remind yourself that God provides for you and that you have what you need. It's not going to happen overnight, especially if you have 15 years of discontentment.

You're NOT alone in this walk and satan is after your mindset concerning contentment! He wants you to think that God has forgotten about you and isn't for you. Instead, recognize that on this earth, we WILL experience tests and trials and these tests will develop things OUT of us that aren't like Him.

Just a few things:

1. Find my (3) books, purity rings, shirts & all that good stuff via!

2. We have developed an APP! Think: daily post notifications + weekly devotionals, recipes and so much more! It's out NOW for iphones + Androids. Under: Heather & Cornelius Lindsey: Today With the Lindsey's

3.  If you live in Atlanta, I want to invite you to our church. Join us on Sundays at 11:00am at Landmark Midtown Art Cinemas. Our churches name is: "The Gathering Oasis"  931 Monroe Drive NE Atlanta, GA. 

4. Register for the 2015 Pinky Promise in Atlanta, GA! It sold out last year and it's 99%  sold out now, so you don't want to miss out! 

6. As always, you can join a Pinky Promise group locally! There's about 35,000 ladies that have joined! Find a group near you by joining & checking out the intro page! Join here:

7. Pinky Promise is hosting a statewide baby shower for low income & single mamas in Atlanta, GA on September 12. If you want to donate or be a part of it, please email For donations only, you can send the payment via PayPal to & be sure to note that its for the Statewide Baby Shower. All donations are tax deductible. 

Hang in there.
God loves you like crazy,

Love ya'll!
Heather Lindsey

A maternity photo! :) 8 more weeks to go!


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Hi Heather,
    I had a question regarding contentment. Can I be content even though I'm hoping for change and long for other circumstances and have other desires? Does being content mean I'm completely satisfied? And if it means I'm completely satisfied, how can I be completely satisfied even when I'm hoping and believing for change?

    1. Hi, I have a similar question. The desire for marriage is generall not acknowledged in Christian circles as a big deal. There is more teaching about, "be happy in that season"but not much advice on how to get out. HOWEVER, when a single lady is in debt, she is generally encouraged to get out of debt- watch your spending and all . why is the one who is unwillingly single encouraged to be Content and not given tips on how to get married "faster" just as the married one is given tips to be a better wife? Is it wrong to want more? GOD said to ask. Why is it that singles are encouraged to love where they r yet it's ok for married people to want (more) kids and advance in married life?

    2. Marriage is ALOT of work.. it isn't something you obtain! Who you marriage affects and determine so many things in our life, it's not something to take lightly. Single people are encouraged to be content so they can be processed and fully ready when The Lord says it's time.. Everything (marriage kids house etc) must be done in the Lords timing because he knows best and has a plan for every detail of our life. It is ok to desire something but it is not wise to rush yo obtain it just because you desire it. Rushing only makes things harder in the future.
      I pray the Lord gives you peace and wisdom concerning every area of your life! ��

    3. Terria,

      These are such great questions, and I hope I can help by answering them.

      1. Can I be content even though I'm hoping for change and long for other circumstances and have other desires?
      - I see that you desire a change in your circumstances. Being a Christian is a process in which we are to renew our minds daily. This means that we are continuously changing, hence going through certain "seasons." You may desire to be your best self to reflect Christ more, which is a legitimate desire. The key is to be content with the person you are now knowing that God has the perfect timing and you're willing to wait and go through His perfect process. To be discontent would be to start looking at others' Chapter 30's when you're only on your Chapter 5. You can have the desire to change, but don't go ahead and change without God. He needs to lead, direct, and guide you through the Holy Spirit. And this is a time to really practice the fruit of the Spirit such as patience.

      2. Does being content mean I'm completely satisfied?
      - I think this depends on what you see satisfying. For me, being completely satisfied would mean sitting with Jesus in Heaven. That is not possible here on earth, but I can still be content with my time here on earth. It would be ridiculous for me to sit in my house all day and night without eating, drinking water, or sleeping just because I was not completely satisfied yet. It would be the same thing if I committed suicide just to get to Heaven and be fully satisfied. I believe God gives us each season because we desperately need it to grow. Since growth is a process, I don't think we will ever be fully satisfied until Jesus comes back and we are completed and whole. In the meantime, yes we can be content in our circumstances with the hope that God will complete the work He started in us and His plans for us are not to harm, but to prosper us.

      3. If it means I'm completely satisfied, how can I be completely satisfied even when I'm hoping and believing for change?
      - You can be completely content while remaining faithful in the hope that The Lord does all things for good, therefore any full satisfaction that we are looking for comes from Him alone. For example, I'm hoping and believing that God is going to bring me my husband. It's ridiculous for me to be miserable now, daydreaming about this mystery man. If I stay miserable, this man might pass me by because I'm not prepared for Him. This man wouldn't be attracted to me because I'm not content on my own, and a real man of God knows that a woman can only find contentment in Christ alone. This man knows that he can't fill my every desire, so I scared him away by showing him my discontentment with myself. And even if he did choose to marry me after seeing my discontentment, how am I going to learn to love him when I didn't first love myself? If I wasn't taking care of myself to begin with, then how could I be a helpmate with his mission? If anything, I would be hindering him.

      I don't know your personal situation, so all of these were random examples that popped up in my mind. Hope this makes sense and helps some!
      - Taylor

    4. There is nothing wrong with desiring and hoping for change. Nothing wrong with that at all. And just because you desire and hope for change in certain situations does not make you discontent. What DOES make you discontent is the attitude you have while you are waiting for the change to occur. Are you prayerfully waiting and seeking God on what He would have you to do in the meantime or are you pouting and complaining because its not happening quickly enough.....?

      There is a huge element of faith in being content. Being content in Jesus says Lord, things are not exactly the way I would like them to be right now, but I do believe (trust in you and have faith) that because I am in you and seeking to do your will things are as they should be and when the time is right things will change. No sooner and no later. If you truly believe God is in control of your life then let him be in control of your life and do not allow yourself to focus on what you don't currently have and make the most of what you do have. (Easier said than done, I know, but its not impossible).

      Most importantly, find out what the Lord desires for you and don't be so focused on what YOU think is best. We have our will and God has His will and most of us have spent most of our Christian existence trying to strong arm God into making our will come to pass instead of us trying to find out what His will (desires) are concerning us (at least I can speak for myself on that one). The more time we spend focusing on the I WANTS the less time we are able to focus on what HE WANTS.

      Maybe God will bring you a husband....maybe He won't. Maybe He will allow for that promotion....maybe He won't. Maybe He will this and that...maybe He won't. At the end of the day, our portion should be in knowing that GOD ACTUALLY KNOWS BEST and if He withholds something from us (permanently or for a time) it actually for our good; whether we know it or not. God is our Father and like any good father we can expect Him to do only those things that benefit and cause us to grow. Psalms 84:11 says He will withhold no good thing from those who walk uprightly. If we truly believe all of this; I mean believe it with every breathe and desire....we will find this elusive thing called contentment so many of us strive to grab a hold of is not too hard to grasp.

      These passages right here might help:
      1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

      Luke 22:42b - Not my will, but your will be done.

      All the best to you all!

  3. Thank you Heather! God bless you.

  4. Wow!!! Exactly what I needed to hear. God bless you and your ministry.

  5. Yes! I heard this message three times today. This morning, at church tonight and now here. Right on time! Thanks Heather. We all need a little reminder.

  6. Thank you so much Heather for your ministry and your posts. Every time I read something of your on Facebook or your blog I am in shock at how accurately it portrays to my life at that exact moment. Definitely God sent!


  7. God bless you Heather. On time word! ����

  8. Heather thank you, this article speaks to me, you have given me solutions to what I'm going through in my life. Yesterday i was asking myself what is my purpose in life, why am I angry all the time, why do i have these voids in me? why am I negative? You have shifted my mindset, God bless you. Holy be @ work in me in Jesus Name.

  9. Thank you so much for this blog. I've been hearing this message since yesterday and I believe that it is something that God is truly trying to put in my heart. You think that once you get married you will be content but then all of your expectations and other trials and tribulations cloud that contentment but you never realize that just because you were content before doesn't mean you should not ask God to help you to be content again. May God continue to use you and may your family continue to be blessed!

  10. I usually don't do this but am moved to write a comment. this has been my PM for over a week now. Been content doesn't mean you should not ask God for more. It means been Grateful with the little you have. many of us forget to be grateful for what we have, sometimes we don't even realize what God is doing for us because we are focused on the bigger demands. Be grateful with the little you have and pray to God for all you expect still. His mercies are new every day and He answers prayers.

  11. Thank you.........i forgot to say that in my earlier post. God bless you

  12. Thank you for your inspiring and fulfilling words Heather! Thank you for reminding me that GOD is real, and that He is ALWAYS with me. God bless you and your family!!!

  13. Thank you heather,God just spoke to me through you

  14. Thank you for your ministry Heather, was convicted through and through. Your guidance and wisdom has helped me grow so much stronger as a Christian. I really liked the part were you said speak to your holy spirit and tell him your angry. I actually did it out loud lol!!


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