"When I No Longer Desire God"

Ever felt like.. you knew that you were supposed to spend time with God, read your bible, pray & do all these "things" and you had the right intentions in doing so.. but as you went about your day, it didn't happen. You thought about it. You felt conviction. You felt God's spirit tugging on you; but you never sat down & just experienced His presence. Then, as the day went to a close and you sat down to watch your favorite show, you said- "It's ok, God loves me and I'll just do better tomorrow." This cycle continues for weeks and it turns into months. You begin to see yourself change from a sweet and patient person to a irritated and impatient woman. You start to gossip a little more, watch a few more shows that you wouldn't usually watch, listen to a little Beyonce (and please, let's stop defending her like she's God. The bible says a tree is identified by their FRUIT.), curse a little there-- you know, your standards begin to adjust. Your guards have been dropped and you are calling yourself a Christian but you cannot figure out why you're miserable. Guess what?

You no longer desire God. 

You see, you desire the music, the shows, the TV, the little boyfriend rubbing on your thigh, the silly unhealthy friendships, the lying, the gossip. You desire those things. You may say that you don't desire them but the way you prioritize your day shows me what is important to you. It shows me where you place your value. It shows me what you're thinking about it. It shows me and .. let's replace "me" with "God" where your HEART is.. you think it's in Him but it's not. Just because you have good intentions doesn't mean anything until you start taking those good intentions & doing something different.

Let's look at it like this: You're married and throughout the day, you talk to your husband, text him, make plans for the future, go on date nights- you are very intentional about developing and desiring Him. You WANT your husband because you continue to water & nourish that tree. Why is it that we enter into a relationship with Christ & we don't talk to Him, don't spend time with Him, aren't intentional but then we wonder why we don't desire a "deeper" relationship with Him?  What also begins to happen is even if your ignorance, the Holy Spirit begins to tug at you to REMIND you to spend time with God and show you your empty voids. You will either adjust and make time for God or, you'll go & seek things to fulfill that void in your heart. You may go have sex, text some guy you know is a hot mess, go back into your past because it appeared more comfortable (it lied), go shopping (you know) and seek fulfillment in something to cover up that hole.

I can save you time, energy, heartache & hurt by reminding you that you'll never be satisfied until you get back to that place of being intentional & seeking Christ daily. You can run to try to find you another "mentor", preacher or whoever else to make you feel better about yourself and spoon-fed you OR you can start to woman-up and be the woman that God called you to be and go get on your FACE before God. It's time out for this foolishness sisters!! We have GOT to do better. How can we continue to exchange God's magnificent presence for the presence of some man that doesn't care about you or some job that you're not even supposed to be at? We have GOT to get back to this place of sitting at the feet of JESUS. It's great that you have your accountability sisters and that you remind each other to spend time with God but let's get to a place where we don't have to be reminded anymore. What if I had to remind you to spend time with your husband? Most likely 1. Your husband would get upset that he wasn't a priority 2. And wonder why the heck do you have to be reminded by another woman to spend time with him. Why is it that we get saved & have to constantly be reminded to spend time with God as if it's a burden? You don't have to be constantly reminded to spend time with someone you LOVE & is FIRST. The answer to the clear question is: You no longer desire God. And let me be clear, there's nothing wrong with accountability but at some point, we must move from "have to spend time with God" to "I get to spend time with God."

I just gave birth to our son, Logan William Lindsey on 3/13/13 (praise God! ;-) And I learned VERY quickly that the sleepless nights & "sleeping" when he is sleeping is crucial. I also found that even in these past few days, I hadn't been spending as much time as I used to spend with God even just days ago. It convicted me. I said.. Lord, I am spending time with the one that is most important to me. Don't ever let me make an idol of my son, even in my lack of sleep & exhaustion. God, help me to want you more than anything or anyone else.

So, what has come into your life and replaced God? I could have very well made my son an idol by giving him my attention 24-7 and made an excuse about my son being a newborn or whatever else. I cannot afford to make that choice, no matter how "sleepy" I am. Reminds me of Matthew 10:37 "Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves their son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me." This is referring to family but we could very well replace father or mother with job, money, a boyfriend, a husband or whatever else. I'm sure Matthew used this reference because these people are usually the ones closest to you. It is BECAUSE of my SON I NEED to spend time with God. It's BECAUSE of my job I NEED to spend time with God. You see, I cannot properly FUNCTION in these roles as a wife, mother, business owner, friend or whatever else if life isn't in PROPER order with CHRIST first. 

Hebrews 5:12 says it nicely: "In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again. You need milk, not solid food!" -- You're going to church, been saved for a bit, joined a Pinky Promise group-- it's TIME TO GROW! Just "doing" these things doesn't mean anything. The question is: When the rubber meets the road & you have a choice to choose GOD vs. something else.. what do you choose?

God pressed it heavy on my heart that people also don't desire Him because life HURTS them and they BLAME Him. We cannot turn our hearts away from the only One that can help us. If life has hit you hard, know that God is close to those that have a broken heart (psalms 34:18) & He is READY to take you back into His arms. STOP running from HIM. HE will use everything that you've been through to bring Him glory. So ask Him to break your hardened heart. Forgive whoever has hurt you. Stop looking at your hurt & start looking at CHRIST.

In short, when you don't desire God.. it's because He is no longer the object of your affection. Want to desire God? Get back to the heart of worship. Get back to that place where you craved Him when you first got saved. Get back to that place of worship. Get RID of anything or anyone that is hindering you. THEN, stay there. Renew your mind. Turn off garbage. Ask God to wreck you daily. This walk isn't a 100 meter sprint.. it's a marathon, so if you expect microwave results, you won't find them in Christianity. You must stay in that place of worship and trusting God no matter what is going on in your life. Let's all make a commitment to get back to this place of worship, starting now.

Few reminders: 
1. If you live in Atlanta, I want to invite you to our church. Join us on Sundays at 11:00am at Landmark Art Cinemas. Our churches name is: "The Gathering Oasis" (there's another church that holds service there too). 931 Monroe Drive NE Atlanta, GA- in Theatre 6.

2. My book is selling like crazy! I'm so thankful for all of you that have supported! Check it out here: My New Book! Pink Lips & Empty Hearts:  www.PinkLipsAndEmptyHearts.com

3. As always, you can join a Pinky Promise group locally! There's about 11,000 ladies that have joined! Find a group near you by joining & checking out the intro page! Join here: www.PinkyPromiseMovement.com 

4. To purchase cross rings, my book, tote bags, fabulous shirts, purity rings & all that other good stuff-- go here: Pinky Promise Store . JUST for visiting this blog, I'll give you 10% off! Use the code: LOGAN. -- (how fitting!)

P.S. If you've asked me questions on here-- know that I'm not ignoring you! I get THOUSANDS of emails & questions and it's super hard to get to each one. Thanks for your patience during this busy time!


Love you all madly,
Heather Lindsey

"God Closing Doors vs. You Opening Them"

You may be in a season where people leave you, job ends, money runs out, things aren’t 100% working out, you’re losing friends or just experiencing loss in general. Gosh, trust me that I understand. I honestly believe I went through that very thing for an entire YEAR. It was the longest year of my life. You really learn who you trust in your darkest hours. I learned that I could lean on and really trust God. He didn’t just become a part of my daily bible ritual—He really became my entire life. I had to cling to Him. It seems like your whole world is caving in and the only One that makes sense is Christ alone. That’s if we decide to turn to Him instead of our circumstances.

I can recall certain situations in life where I tried to stay in a relationship, a job or in a certain place and I just knew deep down that God was closing that door that I desperately kept propped up. I wanted to so badly to stay in those situations—to stay comfortable versus dealing with the fear of the unknown. The fear of being single, the fear of not having enough to pay my bills, the fear of losing loved ones, the fear of not measuring up, the fear of not being good enough or whatever else.  Sometimes, we try to put a comma where God puts a period. Although I shouldn’t have been surprised—God shut those doors. He popped my little pretend-happy bubble. I could have continued to stay in those places and continued those sentences. I could have had a run-on sentence & created an entire storyline.. where God put a period. So, while we’re here—I ask you, do you have any sentences that have continued that you know God ..never intended for you to continue? Most of those sad stories should have never happened. It comes with the territory of ignoring God and living the life we want to live. The heartache, the lies, the abuse, the abortions, the loneliness—you see, God knew these things would come if you stayed around longer then you were supposed to. You couldn’t see those things ahead of time because you were blinded by pretend love, money, status, power, sex, drugs, being comfortable or whatever else. I  DO believe that God does work out things for our good when we live for Him. So don’t beat yourself down if you created an entire storyline.  If you aren’t living for Christ right now, that can change right now. It’s wrapped up in a daily decision to just wake up and live for Him again. God can heal us; no matter how far we’ve fallen away from Him. He longs for your entire heart.

I recall spending the night at my boyfriend’s house when I was single but I would wake up every morning no matter what and would spend hours with God. Sounds weird right? Yeah, one would think that I would start applying what I learned and take my tail home. Anyway,  I continued to spend time with God  & I sat on the guy’s bed and the Lord would show me that I needed to break the relationship off and if I didn’t, it would only get worse. How’s for that? Not long after, we broke up. I was heartbroken but now I understand. God put a period there and it’s not for me to go & try to create some story that should have never been written.  I watched the relationship go downhill. No matter how much I prayed, hoped and wished things would work out or whatever else..The season was over. It was time to move on. Matter of fact, I question the very start of some of my past relationships & situations, those doors were opened by Heather and not Jesus.

You see, those people, jobs, places or whatever else are stumbling blocks. You are tripping over them and falling flat on your face, over and over again. If I placed stumbling blocks in your way as you were walking down the street, you would look at me like I was crazy and walk around them. You would tell me to STOP harassing you and leave you alone. You would say “Heather, clearly I can see that you’re putting huge bricks in my path, I’m not stupid, I’m just going to walk around them—why the heck would I just trip over them and fall flat on my face?”

I believe this question is what all of heaven and the angels ask when we continue in a place where we have stumbling blocks.. and we just keep tripping over them.. over & over again. So, God sends help. He sends blogs, your pastor, your friends, books or whatever else to speak into your heart. Instead, you ignore them and you continue to walk into each block. Doesn’t it sound crazy with that image of me just walking up on you & placing square bricks in your path as you’re walking? You would think I was crazy! Why don’t you feel the same way about satan? And let’s stop blaming him for everything, he sends the stumbling blocks and you have a choice. You don’t have to trip over them. You can trust God & live for HIM in the midst of whatever is going on. Remember that God will give you a way out of every temptation. What temptations are you facing? Sister or Brother, you are NOT alone. ALL of us experience those tests and trials.  I just want to remind you that you don’t need “he” or “it” to make you happy. You really need Christ and if you don’t allow Him to strip you of your idols, you will stay in bondage to those idols forever. Remember that God leads and guides your life. Trust Him, even if your story isn’t playing out the way you intended. He’s with you.

At times, people try to tell me that my life is perfect (and TRUST me, it’s FAR from it!!!!) and that I’ll never understand what they are going through. They say I have the husband, the ministry or whatever else. They see the product of my obedience to Christ but they don’t see the WORK that went into getting where I am today. I just want you to know that I could have a different life story.  Instead of trying to write my own life story, I submitted my life to the One who created me. I have a choice to live for God daily. I could have said “screw this all”—I’m staying with my ex boyfriend, even though God told me to end it. I could have said “Forget reading the bible, this takes too much.” I could have said “Waiting to kiss until my wedding day? PLEASE. I aint waiting that long, I need me some sex.” Do you know that I had a choice in the matter?  I have a choice to write this blog.  I could have said “I’m leaving my marriage at the sign of a first bad argument or whatever else. So please, don’t send me any emails saying that I don’t understand. I was once single, I know and understand the struggles you go through. Where do you think these blogs and my future book is coming from? I’m most passionate about this area of relationships because it’s where I had the most pain. I went through HELL and back as a single. & got serious about my relationship with God and stopped dating randoms & met & married my husband, God’s way. So I challenge you in your own life. YOU HAVE A CHOICE!!!!

....Instead of comparing your life to my life, a pastor, a singer, some reality tv person or whoever else; start comparing yourself to the bible. Take your life and line it up against the bible and use it as a mirror to show you your heart. Let’s not blame anybody else for where we are in life and start taking responsibility for our actions. Granted, you cannot control your life and some of the things that have happened to you but you can control how you respond to them. I want the plan that God has for my life. I don’t want anything outside of it. I want His perfect will so I’ve stopped praying for meaningless, material things and I started praying that my heart would be molded to look like His. So what if I have a couple nice things here & there—what does it mean if my  heart is wicked and hardened towards Him—as a Christian? I just cannot afford it and neither can you. I cannot afford to live this life as a pretend Christ—saying all of these things with my mouth but my heart is so far from Christ. I long to stand before God one day when this is all finished and hear Him say “Well Done my child. Thank you for living for Me & giving me your entire heart.” Oh gosh, it brings tears to my eyes if I lived this whole life and then stood before God and He said that “I never knew you—get away from me as I explained to Him that I preached in His name, wrote books in His name or whatever else.” This is a lot deeper than a blog you’re reading. I believe that God is crying out to you. Crying out to you because He wants to become your first love again. He is so jealous for all of the things and people you place in front of Him. He longs to be first. Please, sister. Brother. Give your entire heart to Him again. Spend time with Him daily and let Him lead you. I can promise you that it won’t be easy but you’ll grow spiritually and the tests & trials will give you endurance and character.

I love you & I’m praying for you.

I am writing this blog as I fly from Dubai to the United States. I was just in Africa for a week spending some time at the orphanage there that we have teamed up with to help support. It was a life changing trip. I will blog about it later and show pictures. I just want to thank everyone who prayed for our team and supported financially. I love you dearly.

Also, my husband just released his first book!! It’s called “So, You Want To be Married?” This book will WRECK you and challenge you as a single or if you’re married. It’s a must read! You can find it here: www.SoYouWantToBeMarried.com

Couple usual reminders!

If you want some cute Pinky Promise bracelets, shirts, or journals go here:

If you want to sign up for a local Pinky Promise Group in your area-- go here! There's about 4500 girls in groups all over the world! Pretty awesome! Go here: 

If you want to sign up for the Pinky Promise Conference in Atlanta--I would LOVE to see you! More details are here: 

(Me in Ethiopia a couple days ago at the Raey Orphanage-- these babies were SO precious!)